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Unread 05-29-2010   #10
Muhznit
The Magical Mammary Man
 
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: In my chair. ._.
Posts: 1,171
Re: Newgrounds

*sigh*
Well, it wasn't too bad. Space lets you avoid infinite-duration fuck scenes. Graphics are decent, power-ups are interesting, but... that's where all the good things end.

This is shiticulous collision detection; the primary reason why any one who even has a single neuron brodcasting an impulse to make a platformer game in flash should use the flixel engine before anything else. That, or skip flash altogether and go with something like Game Maker or Construct at least. They're both free and have a good community, just please, for the love of god, don't add to the shitload of terrible flash platformers that can't use proper collision detection worth shit.

Seriously, want to know how crappy it is? See that first Goomba? Easily dodged. The second one screws you over. Considering the blocks hovering over the little bastard blocking your jump and the absurd not-suitable-for-platforming height of Peach herself, the creator may as well have had Goomdalf yell "YOU SHALL NOT PASS".

And oh, the level design. I like how you can NEVER SEE WHERE THE FUCK YOU'RE TRYING TO JUMP TO. Or that stupid-ass Firebar hovering right over the pit of lava where you have to precisely jump onto the ONE block that's going to save you from becoming a boiled Peach.

Fuck, they should've just stuck to a crappy animation or something. I don't know, Bowser force-feeding Peach mushrooms? BE-Spells cast by Magikoopas? Anything but another horribly-programmed platformer in flash.
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