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Unread 01-29-2014   #1
vincent_richter
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Join Date: Jul 2008
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Re: Sobek's Search for a Girlfriend (NSFW)

Please, for the love of all things holy, do not excuse subpar writing by claiming fursecution.
There are times when that is an appropriate response; replying to confusion over specsheets masquerading as creativity is not one of them.
If you truly wish to improve your craft, think about how you can relate the sexuality of a piece of hardware without resorting to - and here I'm dating myself - Tim Taylor "arrr-arrr-ARRRR!!!" shenanigans.

Honestly, this could be Shakespeare for all I know; my interest in it went right out the window when the real-world references far outweighed the fantasy. It shattered the illusion, and I can't believe you don't find that jarring.

Although, much of that issue could probably be solved by replacing product placement terms - brands, team names, logos and such - with generic references or better descriptors.

"The pair wandered to his (salmon? DayGlo Pink? Sun-faded Barbie Dream House?) (pickup, truck, rig, other love interest), its supercharged might barely restrained by the bounds of the ignition." All but maybe one of the original descriptors is superfluous, but the original intent - relaying that he possesses an ironically-colored truck that could eat us all alive - is not lost.

Explore the space you're given; crack a thesaurus or dictionary to look for similar ways to relay the same intent; avoid stale repetition and you'll draw more interest.

Incidentally, and on this I should've said something sooner, primarily male-centric content should go to Everything Else, with limited exceptions. The Growth subforum is meant for female or couples at the time being, so yes - despite asking ahead of time, you may still see some irate responses.
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