this is a short series im woriking on

10-28-2007

it's called henero island its about a girl who eats some thing simalar to the gum gum fruit(one pice)and gets laticaonal abilites(ala.milkmaid)and elasticty
(.elastigirl)it combines alot of things i like (be,rubber girls,lactitaion) andnothing i dont..(grotesque exteremes)does any one thinkthis would make a good comic

A young girl around 16 landed on a small island
because she fell off the side of the cruiser while playing she lies on the beach wandering
aimlessly, then a small pink fruit drops from a nearby tree the girl eats the fruit and walks
around the island until she finds a tree for shelter and falls asleep. A week later the girl finds out that her hair turned hot pink and she grew taller and her chest grew two sizes the girl was a bit shocked. but she was soon to be very hungry, the girl yawned and her arms and feet stretched 4 feet long, the girl was a bit scared, but soon realized these powers could benefit her she stretches to a nearby tree and takes some fruit and eats it the girl eats it then her chest starts to shake, and she starts to giggle then the girl walked around the island for a bit more then started to want some milk her tattered shirt started to become wet and produce milk. after this the girl was expecting this after all that happened she freely drank from her own chest and the milk was amazingly warm. Then she looked up and she saw it was going to be night

girl :I wonder how long I am going to be here.

SoylentOrange · 10-28-2007

Um... wow.

Holy shit. o_0

Is this serious? Is english your first language?

wolfman-al · 10-28-2007

Around ten?
Dude, I can?t say that I apreciate this.
Also, what the fuck?

Dontino · 10-28-2007

I want my 2 minutes back.

reptileking · 10-28-2007

......WTF was that?
needs alot i mean ALOT of work

thejakeman · 10-28-2007

Now now, calm down.

LEARN THE RULES AND CONVENTIONS OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE.

that is all that needs to be said.

Abazaba · 10-29-2007

Dear gawd people calm down. How hard is it to just change the ONE number from 14 to 18 and be done with it. Under age isn't a big deal in stories all that needs to be done is literally MAKE her eighteen. Since this doesn't focus on her being underage I think its not that bad.

This story although very rough, has a lot of potential. Obviously you are going to have to make her older but fourteen still probably not going to cut it for THIS forum. Try more like 16-18 and it would be fine. I see a lot of promise so keep working on it and update this when you have more of a story going.

Also yes I just noticed he edited it to say fourteen when it seems to have started out at ten. But still just calm down and be calm people. He just posted an IDEA for a comic or story. Not overtly graphic images of OBVIOUSLY underage kids.

People in this forum need to calm down a bit. I know trolls have been a problem. But maybe if we kept cool heads and didn't flame people when they make mistakes. Trolling wouldn't happen as much as it does. Anger only makes for more anger.

Ah well thats my two cents...

reptileking · 10-29-2007

but it does need some work i mean i made some mistakes on my first story so sorry on my first post

Dontino · 10-29-2007

Quote:

Originally Posted by Abazaba

Dear gawd people calm down. How hard is it to just change the ONE number from 14 to 18 and be done with it. Under age isn't a big deal in stories all that needs to be done is literally MAKE her eighteen. Since this doesn't focus on her being underage I think its not that bad.

No one said anything about the underage part.

SoylentOrange · 10-30-2007

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dontino

No one said anything about the underage part.

No, wolfman did.

Personally, I was too distracted by the total absence of anything anyone would call "writing" to notice that bit of it...

roadside_fury · 10-30-2007

I think Wolfman was talking about the age of the writer.

wolfman-al · 10-30-2007

Quote:

Originally Posted by roadside_fury

I think Wolfman was talking about the age of the writer.

No.
He wrote "about a girl at the age around ten"
This is definitively underage.
Allthrough he changed it now to 16.

10-28-2007	#1
xxxx Guest Posts: n/a	this is a short series im woriking on it's called henero island its about a girl who eats some thing simalar to the gum gum fruit(one pice)and gets laticaonal abilites(ala.milkmaid)and elasticty (.elastigirl)it combines alot of things i like (be,rubber girls,lactitaion) andnothing i dont..(grotesque exteremes)does any one thinkthis would make a good comic A young girl around 16 landed on a small island because she fell off the side of the cruiser while playing she lies on the beach wandering aimlessly, then a small pink fruit drops from a nearby tree the girl eats the fruit and walks around the island until she finds a tree for shelter and falls asleep. A week later the girl finds out that her hair turned hot pink and she grew taller and her chest grew two sizes the girl was a bit shocked. but she was soon to be very hungry, the girl yawned and her arms and feet stretched 4 feet long, the girl was a bit scared, but soon realized these powers could benefit her she stretches to a nearby tree and takes some fruit and eats it the girl eats it then her chest starts to shake, and she starts to giggle then the girl walked around the island for a bit more then started to want some milk her tattered shirt started to become wet and produce milk. after this the girl was expecting this after all that happened she freely drank from her own chest and the milk was amazingly warm. Then she looked up and she saw it was going to be night girl :I wonder how long I am going to be here. Last edited by xxxx; 10-29-2007 at 01:07 PM.

10-28-2007	#3
wolfman-al Electric Frankfurter Join Date: May 2005 Location: Frankfurt, darkest Germany Posts: 1,835	Around ten? Dude, I can?t say that I apreciate this. Also, what the fuck? __________________ I see dumb people... My comic: www.airpatrolonline.net

10-28-2007	#5
reptileking Santa's sexy helper Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: virginia Posts: 70	......WTF was that? needs alot i mean ALOT of work __________________ Future story writer My Deviant Art: http://goten99100.deviantart.com/ Where it all happens....again.

10-29-2007	#8
reptileking Santa's sexy helper Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: virginia Posts: 70	but it does need some work i mean i made some mistakes on my first story so sorry on my first post __________________ Future story writer My Deviant Art: http://goten99100.deviantart.com/ Where it all happens....again.

10-30-2007	#11
roadside_fury Frequent Poster Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Small shack on Route 66. Posts: 168	I think Wolfman was talking about the age of the writer. __________________ Roadside_Fury, your everyday road rage specialist. "We again apologize for the subtitles. Those responsible for sacking those responsible have now been sacked."

10-28-2007	#2
SoylentOrange Process Disciple Join Date: May 2005 Posts: 4,920	Um... wow. Holy shit. o_0 Is this serious? Is english your first language?

10-28-2007	#4
Dontino Bored of being an asshole Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Canada Posts: 693	I want my 2 minutes back.

10-28-2007	#6
thejakeman Banned Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 2,360	Now now, calm down. LEARN THE RULES AND CONVENTIONS OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. that is all that needs to be said.

10-29-2007	#7
Abazaba Frequent Poster Join Date: May 2005 Location: Long Beach CA Posts: 342	Dear gawd people calm down. How hard is it to just change the ONE number from 14 to 18 and be done with it. Under age isn't a big deal in stories all that needs to be done is literally MAKE her eighteen. Since this doesn't focus on her being underage I think its not that bad. This story although very rough, has a lot of potential. Obviously you are going to have to make her older but fourteen still probably not going to cut it for THIS forum. Try more like 16-18 and it would be fine. I see a lot of promise so keep working on it and update this when you have more of a story going. Also yes I just noticed he edited it to say fourteen when it seems to have started out at ten. But still just calm down and be calm people. He just posted an IDEA for a comic or story. Not overtly graphic images of OBVIOUSLY underage kids. People in this forum need to calm down a bit. I know trolls have been a problem. But maybe if we kept cool heads and didn't flame people when they make mistakes. Trolling wouldn't happen as much as it does. Anger only makes for more anger. Ah well thats my two cents...