Soma Seed

Cu Roi · 04-28-2011

So the user name doesn't exactly give it away, but I wrote Soma Seed for the giantess club. The story finished up today, and I was wondering if those of you who've read it all the way through wouldn't mind giving some feedback. It was the first time I'd written a comic script of this genre before, but hopefully there was some evolution in style and clarity-- I certainly feel like I learned a lot. Cheers.

Mongoose · 04-28-2011

I'd love to read the original text of the story. While I really liked it, I got the feeling that a quite a bit of the original narrative got lost in the translation to the page-constricted medium of the Giantess Club comic.

There was not a whole lot of character development in the version we got to see, in fact, most of the time I was pretty confused about who was who, their motivations, and exactly what everyone's relationship was to one another. Again, I think this was due to the limitations of the comic.

Anyway, please don't take this as a negative review. I really liked the story and would very much like to see the entire thing as opposed to the abridged version we got from Giantess Club.

Dragoon · 04-28-2011

I would go the same way as mongoose. The story felt like it was cut short somehow, it felt like most of the stuff from it was missing. You can get a little of the story but it's very confusing and lacks a lot of exposition IMO.

A good growth story but missing a lot in it to make it enjoyable.

Dragoon

2dollars · 04-28-2011

Send it to me too. I wrote Above the Law and people seem to like it. So I guess I can give you some feedback

Mongoose · 04-28-2011

Big fan of Above the Law too.

I think Soma Seed was just too big for the number of issues it got. You could easily fill a couple trades with what I suspect is the full story.

Like I said. I would love to read the original transcript.

merritstone · 04-29-2011

I would love to read the story in its true form. Is there a link?

I'm going to critique, but please don't take it personally. This is for constructive purposes only. I salute anyone sharing their fiction with the community at large.

Never read the script, but I followed the first half of the story (don't currently have an account). I really liked that you could get a sense of the larger tale, but sadly the details got *really* lost. The first couple of issues were particularly difficult to follow.

Examples:
1)The male character introduces himself as ALEX but Isabel calls him CASHA. Its a long time before we hear the brunette's name spoken by a character.

2)When they go to castle, tiny brunette is drawn much taller and bustier which seems OK because we just saw her drinking the SomaSeed Juice... so maybe she's bigger now. But she seems totally comprehending the new foreign culture she's been thrust into. And then she's reffered to as 'Isabel'. So maybe the artist just screwed up and drew the wrong girl in the wrong role. But then in the middle of the whipping scene we quickly cut to Isabel walking with the great sister in the hallway. I THINK the brunette's name is Julia.

3) The scene creating the artificial Soma Juice is hot, but who are these people and what do they have to do with anything that happened before in the story?

Maybe I missed a couple things here or there but the end result leaves the reader (or at least me) confused.

kuenbu · 04-29-2011

I agree with Merristone. Great images in the comic. Really great. But I have read it several times trying to understand the plot. Please! Don't come behind me and say."Its Just FAP." After 4 chapters there has to be a plot in there somewhere.

Cu Roi · 05-03-2011

Yeah, it was definitely incredible to see my work put to such amazing art, the guys over there are truly incredible. You're always going to have a degree of confusion in any translation and a big part of this in the beginning was me not thinking like a comic-writer. There were some other technical issues that may have brought up some confusion as well. As for the scripts, I'll definitely scrounge around for them -- they're on one of my older computers. Feedback would be nice, even if I don't intend to apply it to another storyline at GC.

04-28-2011	#1
Cu Roi humble narrator Join Date: Sep 2006 Posts: 49	Soma Seed So the user name doesn't exactly give it away, but I wrote Soma Seed for the giantess club. The story finished up today, and I was wondering if those of you who've read it all the way through wouldn't mind giving some feedback. It was the first time I'd written a comic script of this genre before, but hopefully there was some evolution in style and clarity-- I certainly feel like I learned a lot. Cheers.

04-28-2011	#2
Mongoose Frequent Poster Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 147	Re: Soma Seed I'd love to read the original text of the story. While I really liked it, I got the feeling that a quite a bit of the original narrative got lost in the translation to the page-constricted medium of the Giantess Club comic. There was not a whole lot of character development in the version we got to see, in fact, most of the time I was pretty confused about who was who, their motivations, and exactly what everyone's relationship was to one another. Again, I think this was due to the limitations of the comic. Anyway, please don't take this as a negative review. I really liked the story and would very much like to see the entire thing as opposed to the abridged version we got from Giantess Club. __________________ My Deviant Art Page Last edited by Mongoose; 04-28-2011 at 02:08 PM.

04-28-2011	#3
Dragoon Poser Growth amateur Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 135	Re: Soma Seed I would go the same way as mongoose. The story felt like it was cut short somehow, it felt like most of the stuff from it was missing. You can get a little of the story but it's very confusing and lacks a lot of exposition IMO. A good growth story but missing a lot in it to make it enjoyable. Dragoon __________________ Here I am DGN-dragoon@hotmail.com http://dragoongts.deviantart.com/ https://www.patreon.com/dragoongts?ty=h

04-28-2011	#4
2dollars Process Fan Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 53	Re: Soma Seed Send it to me too. I wrote Above the Law and people seem to like it. So I guess I can give you some feedback

04-28-2011	#5
Mongoose Frequent Poster Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 147	Re: Soma Seed Big fan of Above the Law too. I think Soma Seed was just too big for the number of issues it got. You could easily fill a couple trades with what I suspect is the full story. Like I said. I would love to read the original transcript. __________________ My Deviant Art Page

04-29-2011	#6
merritstone Frequent Poster Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 158	Re: Soma Seed I would love to read the story in its true form. Is there a link? I'm going to critique, but please don't take it personally. This is for constructive purposes only. I salute anyone sharing their fiction with the community at large. Never read the script, but I followed the first half of the story (don't currently have an account). I really liked that you could get a sense of the larger tale, but sadly the details got really lost. The first couple of issues were particularly difficult to follow. Examples: 1)The male character introduces himself as ALEX but Isabel calls him CASHA. Its a long time before we hear the brunette's name spoken by a character. 2)When they go to castle, tiny brunette is drawn much taller and bustier which seems OK because we just saw her drinking the SomaSeed Juice... so maybe she's bigger now. But she seems totally comprehending the new foreign culture she's been thrust into. And then she's reffered to as 'Isabel'. So maybe the artist just screwed up and drew the wrong girl in the wrong role. But then in the middle of the whipping scene we quickly cut to Isabel walking with the great sister in the hallway. I THINK the brunette's name is Julia. 3) The scene creating the artificial Soma Juice is hot, but who are these people and what do they have to do with anything that happened before in the story? Maybe I missed a couple things here or there but the end result leaves the reader (or at least me) confused.

04-29-2011	#7
kuenbu The Chocolate Giantess Join Date: Jan 2006 Posts: 374	Re: Soma Seed I agree with Merristone. Great images in the comic. Really great. But I have read it several times trying to understand the plot. Please! Don't come behind me and say."Its Just FAP." After 4 chapters there has to be a plot in there somewhere.

05-03-2011	#8
Cu Roi humble narrator Join Date: Sep 2006 Posts: 49	Re: Soma Seed Yeah, it was definitely incredible to see my work put to such amazing art, the guys over there are truly incredible. You're always going to have a degree of confusion in any translation and a big part of this in the beginning was me not thinking like a comic-writer. There were some other technical issues that may have brought up some confusion as well. As for the scripts, I'll definitely scrounge around for them -- they're on one of my older computers. Feedback would be nice, even if I don't intend to apply it to another storyline at GC.