Under The General's Command (Complete)

[Apsm]

You know, that's a very well thought out motivation for the sequences. I should try that (in some original way anyway ^^; ).

However (and I apologize if I'm still complaining after the edits), I'm still confused about this passage (the section in bold anyway)

Wilson's eyes glazed over for a moment, which was just enough time to prevent him from seeing his friend suddenly swell up in size before deflating.

Again, it sounds like Larry inflated a little before shrinking (which would make the inflating pointless), though I don't think that's what you're trying to convey. By "swell up in size" did you mean Wilson was shrinking before Larry was? I apologize if I have to nitpick.

[Rubilax]

Thanks, and you should! Understanding the underlying implications behind a transformation adds a bit more spice to the story IMHO. It makes it much more interesting than the usual "A wizard/nanites did it".

That said, you read it right the first time; Larry is the one who is inflating here not Wilson. The reason for this isn't related to some expansion fetish. It related back to the nature of the transformations.

Each of the characters has a specific physical and/or mental characteristic that defines them. Larry is practically a caricature of the Alpha male who is obsessed with his body, and this is reflected by his changes. The transformations aren't simply changing one individual into another, they're striking at the characters core and seek to subvert the traits that define them.

Having Larry's muscles atrophy into oblivion would have been a much quicker, but the goal wasn't just to change his bulk, but also alter the sort of person he is. By having the muscle degrade into fat rather than simply atrophying into oblivion, it shows that Larry has lost an integral part of his character.

I'm beginning to ramble a bit, but the main point is that while the inflation followed by the deflation does initially appear pointless, there's a legitimate reason behind it that will be much more evident once the story is complete and viewed as a whole.

And don't feel bad about the nitpicking. I consider it to be well meaning criticism, and criticism helps keep me going!

[Rubilax]

I'd like to title this next snippet Ferris has a potty mouth.

---- GET SOME (updates)! ----

Ferris cringed as his cheekbones popped outwards. He would be gritting his teeth to cope with the unbearable pain of his skull being crushed inwards if they weren't currently strewn across the hardwood floor. His nose broke several times over as it crunched in on itself while his ears yanked themselves into a small pair of points. He could feel his skin growing taut as it struggled to keep up with the widening of his jaw. His chin narrowed dramatically, sending him reeling back into a corner as if some invisible foe had given Ferris the uppercut of his life. The young man's gums were sliced as a new set of teeth that erupted with volcanic furor, filling his mouth with the taste of blood and calcium.

The bone rending pain burned his throat as it shot through his spine and into the rest of his body. His rib cage tightened like a claw around his organs, squishing them together while his shoulders cracked inwards to match. His hands and feet fractured in a thousand different places as they folded in on themselves. His legs were ripped out from beneath him and savagely stretched to new lengths. Ferris screamed as his spine was reeled inwards, stripping him of any height that his reformed legs had given him. He wanted to pass out from the pain, to sleep until it was all over, but the force that was reshaping his bones refused to give him that mercy. Pressure began to build in his pelvis, filling it with an unbearable tightness. Just when it seemed as if his pelvis would shatter itself, his hips snapped outwards with such force that he thought they would rip through the skin.

Then, just as suddenly as it had started, the pain stopped. Ferris slowly unfurled from fetal position, still sobbing from the pain. When he managed to collect his sense, he pulled himself back up using the wall as a support. As he wiped the tears from his cheeks with a quivering hand, he realized that the contours of his face were all wrong. Ever so slowly, he turned to look at himself in the mirror that was now an arms length away. The fearful, tear-stained face that looked back at him was as round as it was wide. The cheekbones were almost imperceptible as they blended right into full cheeks and a soft jawline that ended in a small, triangular chin. A narrow upturned nose sat above a pair of thick, pert lips. The steel blue orbs that dominated the visage were topped with a pair of thin eyebrows that curved upwards into a look of perpetual disinterest. A bob cut brushed to the right surrounded the face like jagged ebony, concealing the ever-so slight point of his ears. It was a pretty, albeit stern, face, the sort that Ferris might have asked out if it wasn't his own.

On top of no longer being able to recognize his own face in the mirror, there was something off about his body. His clothing, which had once fit him perfectly, now appeared ill-proportioned. His simple, white t-shirt looked strange on him, as if he had borrowed them off of a larger, fatter friend. His jeans seemed at once too big and too small for him, as they clung tightly to his hips but hung loosely off his legs. His hands were barely visible in the folds of his now-oversized hoodie, and his shoes and socks were far too big for his feet.

"What the hell," he whispered, before grabbing his flat(!) throat with his now feminine hands. They may have his words, but the voice that had spoken them was too high pitched to be his own.

"Hello, Hello," Ferris said, testing his new vocal cords, "My name is Ferris and I have a huge cock." He shuddered at that last sentence. The words sounded wrong coming out of his mouth, but they only confirmed that this mature, feminine voice was now his.

As he continued to examine his new features, he noticed that something off about teeth. He flashed them at the mirror and recoiled in shock. His canines and incisors had been replaced by massive, pointed things that would have been more at home in the jaws of a great white shark than those of a human. On a whim, Ferris ran his tongue over them, and the warm taste of blood filled his mouth.

"Well shit" He grumbled bitterly as he spat a small glob of saliva and blood, "Wasn't that a surprise."

----

Coming Up Next: Oh. Oh My. *starts dimming the lights*

----The Prize has been awarded.

[Foxtrotugene]

I've had a guess on this for a couple days but couldn't remember the character's name! Finally recalled/found it though: Ferris is rapidly becoming [redacted] from [also redacted].

Which is awesome.

[Rubilax]

DING! DING! DING!
WE HAVE A WINNER!

Feel free to send me the details of your request at your discretion!

And if you could be so kind as to hide your answer, that would be lovely

almost as lovely as those tracts of land amirite

[Foxtrotugene]

Answer hidden! I'll brain storm and come up with something good.

[Rubilax]

Sorry about the lateness and the shortness, but here's the latest addition to the story!

Welcome to Update Nation. Population: This Snippet

As he was walking back to his chair, Larry was overcome with vertigo. He stumbled for a moment, but managed to catch himself before he could fall over

"What's wrong?" Wilson asked, leaving his can of beer behind as he came to his friend's aid.

"It's nothing man," Larry quickly replied, before coughing into his sleeve. "I'm just feeling a... a little lightheaded is all." Neither of the two men in the cabin found it strange that Larry's deep and husky voice had become soft and sweet, after all, why should they? Larry had always been a soprano rather than a baritone.

"Are you sure about that?" Wilson asked, tapping one of his friend's now-narrow shoulders.

For the first time in his life, Larry had to look up, way up, instead of down to see Wilson's face. As he did, Wilson was struck by the softness of his friend's face. How had he never noticed those warm eyes, or the those round cheekbones?

"Y-yes," Larry replied, his cheeks flush as he suddenly noticed just how tall his friend was. It seemed a bit odd at first, after all, he was 6'4". He should have had towered over Wilson, not the other way around. But no, that wasn't right. Larry had been a lowly 5'2" ever since the 5th grade, which meant that there was nothing weird about having to crane his neck just to see his friend's face. Looking at Wilson that stirred something inside of Larry, as if he was looking at his friend for the first time. A warmth began to build up in his groin, one that was at once familiar and radically different. It was like an inverted erection, going down and in instead of up and out. Larry shuddered for a moment as a sudden rush of ecstasy flowed through him, rewiring his body and his mind. He hardly felt it as the source of his masculine pride was drawn into his body, leaving a pair of fleshy folds in its wake.

As this was happening, Wilson was struck by the memory of the moment when he and Larry had first met; It was Frosh week. Wilson, fresh out of high school and having been abandoned by his friends, decided to go to one of the many frat parties taking place on campus. Right outside one of the Frat houses, he had accidentally bumped into a veritable mountain of muscle who later introduced himself as...

That last scene replayed itself in Wilson's mind, only this time the mountain was gone, replaced by a petite figure who had introduced himself, no, herself, as...

"Wilson?" a melodic voice inquired, interrupting his flashback. Something clicked at the back of his mind when he looked at the adorable face in front of him.

"What is it?" He replied.

"You zoned out there," the woman asked, "is everything alright?"

"Just a little headache is all," Wilson said, rubbing his temples as tried to find the missing piece of his memory. He didn't notice that the woman next to him was facing a similar dilemma, but was doing a much better job of hiding it from her... friend was it?

How had they met again exactly? She remembered a night, just over a year ago, at Phi Kappa house. She'd been there with her brot-sisters looking for recruits for their Fr-Sororiety when she'd spotted an aimless Frosh trying to get in... But then her mind went blank. What else had happened that night? Or ones that followed it?

----

Updates are going to be coming in a lot slower for the next while on the account of papers and finals. I'm aiming for once a week at the moment, but we'll see about that.

Coming Up Next: More developments downstairs, IF you know what I mean.

[Apsm]

Ok, I'm now positive Wilson's the only one keeping his manhood. At least I think he is since the changes don't seem to be affecting his body much.

Larry had been a lowly 5'2" ever since the 3rd grade

You know, maybe Larry had an early puberty, but that's awfully tall for a kid in third grade (I assume 8-9 year old where you're from). You sure you don't mean his/her third year in middle school or high school?

[Rubilax]

Now that you mention it, 5' 2" is a bit tall for a 3rd grader. I'll fix that so it makes more sense.

As for your other comment,

[Rubilax]

Sorry for the (Very) long delay. I had a bit of a personal crisis that was all kinds of bad. The good news is that it's over now and I can start moving forward. The bad news is that I probably failed a few important classes because of it.

But enough about my problems, let's get back to Ferris's.

A NEW UPDATE APPROACHES

As his two 'friends' were rediscovering themselves, Ferris was trying to come to terms with his own changes. He tried to leave the room, only to find that the door was locked shut. Panic seized his face as he pushed and pulled on handle, but to no avail. He raised his fist and was about to start banging on the door and cry out for help when he stopped. The fist came unclenched as his arms fells to his sides. His shoulders slumped over as Ferris's fear gave way to resignation. With a loud sigh, the altered student walked over to the bed, and collapsed onto the soft sheets. He spread out his arms and legs, listening to the sound of his heart pumping blood into his ears as he stared blankly up at the bronze ceiling.

Ever since he'd been woken up that morning to the sound of Larry leaving dents in his door, his entire day had just gone from bad to worse. It wasn't enough that he hadn't gotten to bed until four in the morning waiting for the man who had sold him the boat to drop off the keys, that his parent's had just cut off his funding, or the fact that he had received a call from a lawyer on the way over here claiming that he'd pirated over four dozen movies in three days, and that he was expected in court in a week. No, apparently Ferris also needed to get locked up in the hull of a derelict ship to have his skeleton and face re-arranged.

"What did I do to deserve this?" Ferris mumbled,

An oppressive silence answered his question.

"Is this what I get for being generous? For being a nice person?" He said, a bit louder this time.

"All I've done, all I've ever done is help people. Charities, loans, projects, essays... When someone asks me to do something, I just do it. I don't ask for a reward or payment, because good people do things because its the nice thing to do. But instead of being treated nicely, I get shit on. People just take and take and take and I just give." The last word wasn't so much spoken as it was spat.

"What's a nice guy like me gotta do to have something go his way for once? huh? Because I've spent my entire life doing everything for anyone who asks, and somehow I'm the one who has to deal with this shit. I let a friend use my computer for the weekend, and I get slapped with the lawsuits. I help a drunk girl home, and suddenly I'm a the perverted rapist. I buy a goddamned boat for two guys I barely know, and I lose my freaking face. How is that fair? Just how the fuck is any of this fair?" Ferris shouted, squeezing the folds of the sheets so tightly that his knuckles turned white. He lay there for a moment, letting the silent wash over him as he fumed over every single moment in his life where he'd been taken advantage of, where he'd been punished for some one else crime.

"You know what? I'm done," He snarled, "If this is how good people get treated, then I'm through with being nice and friendly. And most importantly, I'm done with you, so why don't you go and fu-uuh!"

Ferris's tirade was cut off as a wave of erotic pleasure rippled across his body. A slight tinge of pain marred the feeling slightly as his rising cock struggled against the front of his jeans. He reached down, his hands trembling as he fumbled with the button that held the crotch together. The moment he managed to undo the button and unzip the pants was one of agonizing bliss as the raging erection, freed from its denim confines, rocket up and out of his boxers. He closed his eyes in rapture, imagining that the moans were not his own, but rather those of an unbearably sexy woman, the kind that he'd never been able to get his hands on.

It crossed his mind for a moment that this had been the closest he'd ever gotten to a woman, but he shrugged that thought off as it made no sense whatsoever. Aside for the voice and face, Ferris was a man, anatomically speaking. To think, even for a second, that this was the closest thing to sex that he'd ever experienced was complete lunacy.

Ferris's train of thought came screeching to a halt as his ball sack suddenly tightened around its contents. He screamed in agony as his balls twisted themselves closer and closer to his body. He reached down to untangle them as they continued to pressed against his pelvis, the pressure mounting higher and higher until...

Schrop

With a hollow, wet sound, Ferris's testicles tore their way into his body. He ground his teeth together as he felt his ballsack split open, allowing the errant genitals to drill their way deeper and deeper into his pelvis. He felt them split from one another and curve outwards, leaving fleshy tunnels behind them before they finally came to a rest somewhere deep in his core. A warm flash interrupted his agony, giving the student a chance to feel his testicles shift inside of him, changing into something was wholly different before vanishing from his senses all together. But Before he could muse on what had just happened, his attention was drawn by the developments occurring outside of his body.

His cock flailed painfully from side to side as muscles formed in the slit that now sat beneath it, a slit that was growing wider and fleshier by the second. He tried to steady the wild organ, only for his hand to spasm at the last possible moment, causing him to squeeze it with all the strength in his feminine hands. Ferris screamed as his cock compressed under the stress. The tense muscles that had been keeping his cock from joining its comrades melted as the last bastion of his masculinity slipped from his grasp and was drawn into the feminine folds below.

---

Coming Up Next: *starts lighting candles*

[Apsm]

Not much this time...

"What's nice guy like me gotta do to have something go his way for once?

I think you mean "What's a nice guy like me".

Ferris's train of thought came screeching to a halt as his testicles were suddenly his ball sack suddenly tightened around its contents.

That needs re-phrasing.

Otherwise, I'm getting worried that Ferris is gonna become a jerk with this transformation. Well, that or it's the motivation s/he needs to start bossing people about...even at the cost of his/her morals (and other things).

[Rubilax]

Fixed and rephrased. Thanks for that.

To be honest, I wasn't sure if the Ferris's rant was effective in getting across the idea I wanted. But the fact that you're thinking about its implications for his personality means that I was successful.

And because my muse is feeling generous today...

---ALL ABOARD THE UPDATE EXPRESS! TOOT TOOT! I'LL BE COLLECTING YOUR TICKETS SHORTLY! YOU CAN FIND REFRESHMENTS IN THE DINING CAR!---

The more Lara tried to make sense of her jumbled memories, the clearer her thoughts became. Her mind felt sharper, making more connections at a faster rate than she'd ever been able to. The reading that she'd been struggling with yesterday was making a lot more sense, and she was feeling a lot more confidant about the project she'd handed in just a week ago. What class had that been for again? It couldn't have been for that remedial calculus class she was only taking to fulfill her requirements, Right?

A light bulb went off, and Lara just barely resisted the urge to slap her forehead at the preposterous idea that she'd been in such a low-level course. Remedial calculus? Please. She could solve differential equations in her sleep. No, that project had been for her advanced dluid dynamics course to make up for having missed her mid terms on the account of recovering from a three day bender with her... Sorority? But that didn't make sense. She hadn't gotten into the sorority. She'd never even tried to get in, and the thought hadn't even crossed her mind until her floor mates had proposed the idea to her, even if she didn't have the right figure for it.

Lara's shoulders slumped slightly as the brash spark of arrogance that had once defined her was extinguished. She looked down at her practically flat chest and sighed. Curves just weren't in her genes. That's why she'd never kissed a boy before coming to university. Heck, she'd never been remotely close to anyone of the opposite sex until she'd met Wil-l. She unconsciously shifted a bit closer to the tall, rugged figure next to her as she thought back to that chance encounter a little over a year ago.

The library! Will exclaimed mentally as he remembered where he'd first met Lara. He'd been struggling with some calc work when he'd accidentally bumped into the petite woman beside him. She'd had her head down in a book filled with enough equations to make his head spin she tripped over backpack that he'd left sticking a bit too far out from underneath the table. He wasn't exactly sure how the conversation had gone from apologies to her helping him through his homework, let alone how one and a half semesters of impromptu tutor sessions had culminated so , but he frankly didn't care. Lara may have not been the sort of girl he'd have expected himself to go out with, but was infinitely more interesting than any of the girls that had practically thrown themselves at him throughout high school and the first year of university. He looked back at petite woman who, as always, seemed to be lost in her own thoughts.

A devious idea popped into Will's mind, one that he'd had many time before. He slowly reached down across her back, being careful not to alert her of his intentions until it was too late. In a single, fluid motion, Will wrapped his arm around the woman's waist and pulled. Lara jumped a bit as she was pulled from her reverie and into the arms of her lover.

"Will you ever stop doing that?" asked the flustered engineering student.

"I dunno," the rugby player replied with a playful grin, "Will you ever stop looking so cute when you're surprised?"

"You can be so immature sometimes," Lara said as she gave Will a light slap on the arm.

"That doesn't mean it isn't true," Will answered with a tap on the nose.

"You're hopeless," Lara sighed, wrapping her arms around her boyfriend as she pressed herself up against his well defined core. It almost seemed to good to be true; a flat chested, workaholic gear head like her with a cut rugby player like him? It sounded like something out of the bad romance novels that she kept hidden under her mattress. As much as she was happy just enjoying the time she had with him, there was always a nagging doubt at the back of her mind that this was just a brief fling. And though Will had told her that her lack of assets never bugged him, she felt that he wasn't telling the whole true. After all, she'd seen some of his ex-girlfriends during their study sessions, who were adventurous and perky in more ways than one. The fact that she'd managed to be with him for several months longer than any of them was a bit of a surprise, not only to herself, but also to his friends and her own.

Warmth swelled in her chest as Will's hand slid down her waist to caress her hips. She unconsciously rolled them as her lower back snapped inwards, which would have pressed her deeper into her lover's embrace had something not begun to push back. The metabolism that her previous life had given her slowed to a crawl as fatty tissue began to flow down her legs. Her pants split at the calf, revealing increasingly soft flesh that lay beneath it. The bottom half fused her shoes and turned black as they tightened around her sculpted thighs. The seat of her pants seemed to vanish underneath of folds of the blue coat she'd was wearing before they wrapped themselves around her expanding bottom. Lara rolled her hips, causing Will's hand to slip a few inches lower and onto the curves of her perky ass. She offhandedly noted that their embrace felt a lot softer than before. For a moment, it felt as if her chest was straining against her lover's core, so she shifted her posture to the side, allowing the bountiful folds of her chest to flow outwards. She didn't notice it as her center of gravity shifted outwards, let alone notice the increased support as her undershirt wrapped itself around the ever-increasing curves of her bosom. She did, however, feel Will's little friend stiffen up against her pelvis.

"Getting a bit excited are we?" Lara said, reaching up to unbutton his collar.

"Can you blame me?" Will replied coyly, "You make that uniform look good."

A slight frown marred Will's handsome features as he mulled over that last sentence. Uniform? He thought, That can't be right. We're not in uni- the academy any more. Why would Lara be wearing in her uniform? Why should I be wearing my uniform? Aren't we off duty right now?

-----

....Um yeah. I'm not so good with romantic dialogue. But whatever. That's two long-ish updates in less than 24 hours.

Coming Up Next: *breaks out bongo drums*