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Unread 12-17-2007   #1
Mysticguy
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It Figures(TG, SW, BE, Clothing, Inanimate, Mental)

Aakashi has just finished up a couple of TG sequences, and here's the big one! We'd like to hear some thoughts!
Attached Images
File Type: jpg IF1.jpg (115.8 KB, 1539 views)
File Type: jpg IF2.jpg (130.3 KB, 1360 views)
File Type: jpg IF3.jpg (135.6 KB, 1497 views)
File Type: jpg IF4.jpg (139.5 KB, 1567 views)
File Type: jpg IF5.jpg (177.0 KB, 1523 views)
File Type: jpg IF6.jpg (110.1 KB, 1407 views)
File Type: jpg IF7.jpg (127.4 KB, 1266 views)
File Type: jpg IF8.jpg (166.3 KB, 1260 views)
File Type: jpg IF9.jpg (144.9 KB, 1298 views)
File Type: jpg IF10.jpg (99.4 KB, 1233 views)
File Type: jpg IF11.jpg (145.7 KB, 1235 views)
File Type: jpg IF12.jpg (115.5 KB, 1347 views)
File Type: jpg IF13.jpg (141.4 KB, 1329 views)
File Type: jpg IF14.jpg (114.9 KB, 1284 views)
File Type: jpg IF15.jpg (97.4 KB, 1402 views)
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Unread 12-17-2007   #2
Very_Good_Karma
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I like this! The art is okay, and carries the story, but this is the first original transformation plot I've seen in years. Other pluses:

- The characterizing bit at the beginning really helped the story hold together, and was even a little funny.

- Lots of process, duh. The whole point of coming here.

- While characters narrating their own transformation can get really awkward, the blow-by-blow here is handled well and adds to rather than subtracts from the comic.

- The big third panel on page 10 sets up the last act of the story very well and gives a nice sense of the passage of time.

- A character who intentionally seeks out a transformation rather than just being a prop.

- Happy Ending! Woo!


Some things you might want to improve on:

- The faces. In some panels, they have been drawn waaay too hastily. I understand that this is a loose drawing style, but there is a level of distortion which just looks bad. The first panels of pages 10 and 12 are major offenders.

- Eye style. The characters' pupils come and go; it seems to be attempting to convey a wink sometimes, but other times it's not clear what it means. The all-white eyes came off as a little creepy in some panels. I'd recommend working on a wider range of expressions, especially a proper wink, and making pupils consistent unless it's associated with a complete character style-shift such as chibi.

I really enjoyed seeing this, and thank you for posting it on The Process!
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Unread 12-17-2007   #3
bacattack
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This one was close to being beyond awesome, While I've never been comfortable with how the artist draws eyes that's a matter of personal preference, not a comment on the quality of the art.

I like that the artist tried to give it a sense of story and character. That's something most of these TFs lack, and it's a nice change from the norm.
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Unread 12-17-2007   #4
I-Dig-Hot-Chicks
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Hehehe! That was funny!
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Unread 12-17-2007   #5
Ran
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Aah, I check the ~akuoreo deviantart fairly often. The style is distinctive, I like it. This one is quite good. She's done better ones, but it's up there.
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Unread 12-17-2007   #6
TroyXavier
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Overall nice but I definitely agree with the eye thing......it's like they're not even attached to the body in some panels.
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Unread 12-17-2007   #7
dokhidamo
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I tried the deviant page someone posted above and I couldn't find anything. Anyone have a link to a site with more of this on it?
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Unread 12-17-2007   #8
gruegirl
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It's very nice, I tend to like Akashi's style, particularly his stuff with Legion.
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Unread 12-17-2007   #9
Vengeance1701
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Grue, I'm fairly certain Akashi is a girl. Near 100 percent certain
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Unread 12-17-2007   #10
Mysticguy
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Yes, she is a girl. Once we have a camera, I shall attempt to capture her image and prove it.
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Unread 12-17-2007   #11
TroyXavier
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I have no problems believing it. Just wish she'd draw her guys a little more masculine. Her girls are very nice though.
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Unread 12-17-2007   #12
ToboR
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What a very entertaining series of transformations throughout! The only real complaint I have is that the "narrative" of the victim gets to be a little much sometimes. Of course, when there's largely only one person there, it's also pretty boring to not hear what they're thinking, either.
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