Layers (Incomplete)

frice2000 · 10-04-2012

Too much focus on the masturbating and bodily fluids for me so I won't be reading this any further. Looking past those issues you've got a compelling story and the psychology of the character is interesting as well as the subtle transformation after the fact... Making him plausibly seem insane and having no proof of his transformation, or deniable proof might have made for a deeper story, but what you have is interesting as well. I just can't read through the bodily fluid stuff anymore that's just way too focused on in this story for me, but again even saying that can appreciate that this is fairly solid.

10-04-2012	#11
frice2000 "My way of thanking you" Join Date: Jan 2006 Posts: 401	Re: Layers - Short Story Too much focus on the masturbating and bodily fluids for me so I won't be reading this any further. Looking past those issues you've got a compelling story and the psychology of the character is interesting as well as the subtle transformation after the fact... Making him plausibly seem insane and having no proof of his transformation, or deniable proof might have made for a deeper story, but what you have is interesting as well. I just can't read through the bodily fluid stuff anymore that's just way too focused on in this story for me, but again even saying that can appreciate that this is fairly solid.