Delurking with a story

ragnarok385 · 01-02-2012

Hello everyone,

I've been frequenting this site and others for quite a while, and thought I would make a modest attempt at providing something new to the discussion. I have attached a story below about a girl who finds out her boyfriend has a breast expansion fetish. She freaks out and travels to the mall where she purchases a "magic" ring with the inscription "Do unto others as you would have others do unto you." Dismissing the silly notion, she and her boyfriend find that all choices have consequences, some better than others.

A warning, this story contains some DG, BE, GTS, and PE. For those who aren't fond of such a thing I am happy to send you on your way. But for those who this is hopefully their cup of tea feedback is appreciated.

Thanks in advance.

opailopai · 01-03-2012

I didn't mind this at all. I just noticed no one else commented so I thought I would. You could try tossing it up on overflowing bra and fictionmania , might get more of a proper critique there.

ragnarok385 · 01-03-2012

Already posted it over on overflowingbra thanks for the idea though! So far no comments from them, but glad you enjoyed it

draven · 01-03-2012

As you can see, I rarely post, but I read this on TOB and loved it. I like the concept and the execution. I can see how the story may continue or be changed around...what if someone else got a hold of the ring...?

In any case, whatever you decide to do, well done. Me likey.

secret50k · 01-08-2012

this is one of the best stories I've read in years. Thank you!!

ragnarok385 · 01-08-2012

Thanks a lot! I'm sure I can speak for every writer out there when I say that when someone likes your story its an absolutely amazing feeling.

Working on the continuation when I can find the time. Any suggestions on what you want to see?

secret50k · 01-09-2012

Really liked the characters and how they interacted. The boob related revenge was a good twist too.

Would like to see the couple 6 months later. How the ring has affected their relationship. If another tricky power shift has taken place. And if the boob related lesson has now been learnt.

ragnarok385 · 04-29-2012

So to everyone who read the first part of my story, I give you part 2! Thanks to everyone who commented back I hope you enjoy the second part just as much as the first

This story contains some different elements mainly TG, PE, Muscle Growth, and of course some good old fashioned BE.

01-03-2012	#2
opailopai BOOBXBOOB XIII Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 62	Re: Delurking with a story I didn't mind this at all. I just noticed no one else commented so I thought I would. You could try tossing it up on overflowing bra and fictionmania , might get more of a proper critique there. __________________ Check out my deviant art for many process-y drawings!

01-03-2012	#3
ragnarok385 Lurker Join Date: Oct 2007 Posts: 18	Re: Delurking with a story Already posted it over on overflowingbra thanks for the idea though! So far no comments from them, but glad you enjoyed it

01-03-2012	#4
draven Reluctant Poster Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: AZ Posts: 11	Re: Delurking with a story As you can see, I rarely post, but I read this on TOB and loved it. I like the concept and the execution. I can see how the story may continue or be changed around...what if someone else got a hold of the ring...? In any case, whatever you decide to do, well done. Me likey.

01-08-2012	#5
secret50k Process Fan Join Date: Aug 2006 Posts: 61	Re: Delurking with a story this is one of the best stories I've read in years. Thank you!!

01-08-2012	#6
ragnarok385 Lurker Join Date: Oct 2007 Posts: 18	Re: Delurking with a story Thanks a lot! I'm sure I can speak for every writer out there when I say that when someone likes your story its an absolutely amazing feeling. Working on the continuation when I can find the time. Any suggestions on what you want to see?

01-09-2012	#7
secret50k Process Fan Join Date: Aug 2006 Posts: 61	Re: Delurking with a story Really liked the characters and how they interacted. The boob related revenge was a good twist too. Would like to see the couple 6 months later. How the ring has affected their relationship. If another tricky power shift has taken place. And if the boob related lesson has now been learnt.